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Aberrant RPG - Problems with....Taint

Blue Thunder

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I have a problem with the word Taint.

And it comes up every time I was ever ST for Aberrant. Just the barest whisper of the word would result in giggles and snickers. I've finally decided to say 'T' instead of 'Taint' during games, because frankly, I'd rather hear Mr. T jokes during an Aberrant game than Taint jokes.

But many of you don't know what I'm talking about, do you? That's because the slang usage of "taint" isn't a widely known term. I always thought it was. But apparently it is not.

I'm going to link to the Wikipedia entry on "Taint (Slang)" just for reference. And so you know, the picture off to the side of the entry is not pretty to look at, nor is it safe to look at while anyone else is in the room. They'll probably think you were into Taint porn or something.

Wikipedia: Taint (Slang)

Now you start to see my problem with the term as it is used in Aberrant. Now you can understand why my players make Taint jokes.

There was: "If my Quantum-Bolt is purchased Tainted...how does that look, visually? Do I shoot it from my own taint, or what? Cause that's nasty. But still kinda cool."

And then there was: "My Taint is so high, I have to wear special baggy pants that make room for it. The ladies are impressed. I used to stuff my taint, but no longer, because every nova gets a nice Taint rating."

Oh, and my favorite: "My Taint is 7...that's like a second penis. I have a second penis! Does that count as a Body Mod? Oh, and if I take Flexibility, can I stretch my Taint and attack people with it?"


My favorite definition is from the Urban Dictionary:

1. taint

The area between the nutsack and asshole that prevent a man from shitting on his nuts. See durf.

If it wasn't for the taint, my nuts would reek of poo!

I love how they need an example sentence at the end, like any good dictionary.

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