Aberrant: Stargate Universe - Strange Proposition [Complete]

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

Olivia was nervous. It wasn't kinda nervous, but sweat-dripping, hands-shaking nervous that meant she was going to have trouble maintaining her composure. That was unfortunate, because what she had planned required a bit of a cool head.

Being around him was hard enough. An exchanged nod in the hallway was enough to make her stomach clench for a second. She couldn't imagine talking to him. Like Vinny and Declan, he was huge, and he carried that massive body around with the insolent grace that marked all the specialists. Dark eyes and hair, those big muscles - he was her walking nightmare, just like Vinny, just like Declan.

Only neither of those men inspired as much fear in her anymore. Declan caused none, and Vinny was getting there, too. This morning, she'd been sparring with Declan, and he'd pinned her to the floor, and she'd felt no fear, no unease. In fact, she'd laughed and made a joke, and then she'd known - this wasn't a true test of how far she'd come anymore. Oh, his training was incredibly beneficial, and probably always would be, but she couldn't assess how she'd react in the battlefield, not with someone she trusted as much as she did him.

That was why she walked across the cafeteria and sat down across from Major Ryan Hawke, putting her tray down as clear announcement of her intention to join him. She didn't know him, didn't know anything about him and had kept it that way. He was a near stranger to her, recognizable only as another specialist. Putting her sweating hands in her lap, she smiled and said in a strained voice, "Hi. It's Major Hawke, right? I'm Dr. Olivia Jenings-Izumi. Do you have a moment?"

[Ryan Hawke]

Ryan was going through his daily routine in his head, getting ready for a good workout on the machines in the gym. Then one of the other Specialists intruded into his space. He looked up, saw who it was and Smiled. He'd heard the rumors around base about the young doctor, but paid them little heed.

"Good morning Doctor. I'm not busy no, so please sit down and join me."

He was polite and genial, as he'd been raised to be. "Now what's on your mind this morning, something I can help you with?"

It was all suprising in a way. Everyone had largely given him a wide berth, his size and look being a barrier of sorts. He really only knew his team, though that had already changed twice, with Kyria's departure, and Omar and Simms' addition to the team. He'd yet to find a balance of synergy, but he was working hard on it.

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

"Yes, maybe." She paused and bit her lip; clearly nervous she said, "I have a particular problem, and... I hope that I can trust you to not talk about it around base?"

"I don't listen or trade gossip, if that's what you're asking," Major Hawke said, his voice reassuring.

"Good," Olivia said, nodding. "Because I'd rather not have people knowing this. I debated even coming to you." She stopped; he didn't need to hear her internal argument, hashed out again. "I have trouble in close-quarters hand-to-hand combat. I've been getting instruction from De- Sgt. Perrault, but I'm comfortable enough that the one thing I really need to test isn't valid anymore." He looked at her blankly.

Olivia sighed and tried again. "Several years ago, I had a bad run-in with some men. They were large, well-built, physically imposing," she said softly. "It scared me badly, and since then, I panic when in close combat. I need to get over it. I'm asking you to help, because Sgt. Perrault doesn't scare me anymore." She stated this as naturally as if it was normal for a petite historian to not be afraid of a human killing machine. "Not to be blunt, but... I don't have that familiarity with you."

[Ryan Hawke]

Ryan nods. "Alright. I suppose serving with someone, training with them regularly, that sort of thing does engender a certain trust that makes simulating the reality of combat difficult."

He chuckles. "Well I suppose I had that last part coming. I haven't been the most accessible officer on base, especially for people not part of my team."

He smiles. "So you want to spar with me? Are we talking full contact sparring Doctor, or what exactly? I don't have a problem helping you continue your training, but I want to know exactly how far you want to go, how hard you want me to come at you."

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

"Eh, um, not too hard!" Olivia yelped, her hands coming up as if to ward him off already. "I'm really, really fragile. Like human fragile. Like please don't break me." She shook her head. "I'm in perfect health, for an average human."

She lowered her hands, slowly. "I'm not up on the fighting terms, so does full-contact mean 'pulverize Olivia'? Or does it mean hand-to-hand grappling? Because it's the grappling that's really going to mess with me."

[Ryan Hawke]

"Full Contact means I use whatever technique I feel i should to defeat you. It also means without pads."

"I'm not suggesting that level, but I want to know what you expect. I know dozens of ways to disable disarm or defeat an opponent that don't involve lethal force. Some of them are rather quick and painful. I want to know how real you want this to seem."

He shakes his head. "It isn't my intent to pulverize you. I don't feel like being hated my most of the other men on base. I just want To give you exactly what you are asking for."

"If you want to simply practice getting out of grapples or holds, I can do that too. I can regulate my physical strength to regular human levels. Is that more of what you'd like to try?"

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

"Right," Olivia said, swallowing hard. "I really don't know what I need, except that I need to test if I've gotten enough control over my fear. This could be solved as simply as by you grabbing me. I tend to get really jumpy really fast," she confessed.

She paused, blinked and asked, "Most of the men- You know what? I don't want to know. I just... don't." She pressed a sweaty hand to her forehead, grimaced and pulled it away. "I'll level with you. I was raised by pacifists. Until the... attack, I carried myself through problems by being a smart aleck. After that, I just didn't let myself get into trouble like that anymore. So I'm not very familiar with fighting; I've mostly learned since coming to SGC." She gave him a pretty smile and a helpless shrug. "I'm way out of my depth."

[Ryan Hawke]

"From all accounts though, you're a good quick learner."

"There's nothing wrong with not liking fighting. If everyone liked waging war there'd never be peace."

He smiles. "Tell you what, let's finish eating and head to the gym. We can try a few holds to see if you've gotten over your issues, and afterwards i can show you a few methods for incapacitating someone without really fighting and killing them, Sound Good?"

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

"Um, ok," Olivia said, a bit hesitant. She wasn't sure how Declan would feel about her getting training from another, but she wasn't sure he'd object either. Her physical training and his conditioning were their 'things', the parts of their life that they didn't share with others. She wasn't sure Declan would be ok with this. He might even not like what she was doing here, without his supervision. Hawke wouldn't hurt her though, of that much, Olivia was sure. "Keeping in mind my complete lack of knowledge, is it ok to learn things from other people while getting tutelage from another? I mean, learning things from you won't screw up what Declan's trying to teach, right?"

She picked up an orange and started to peel it. Her hands were shaking so much that it proved to be impossible, and she set it down with a sigh. She'd take her plate to go, and eat afterward.

[Ryan Hawke]

Ryan shakes his head. "It could. but what I'll be doing is mostly to help you deal with your issues, something you've already stated Declan cannot do."

He smiles. "I learned to fight from multiple instructors as a Marine. Everyone brought something different to the mat, and thus far the mix of styles has worked very well for me."

"Relax. If you're too tense Doctor, you'll just get hurt or hurt yourself in practice. Go in not thinking of anything, or if you must, solely on how you will defeat your opponent."

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

"Look, I wasn't kidding when I said this is an issue for me," Olivia said softly. Her eyes dropped to her plate as she admitted, "I think I've already proved that I'm not ready, just by my reaction here, but I have to know if I've made any progress. I have to get over this."

She rubbed her hands on her BDU and said, "I'll try to remain as calm and relaxed as I can." She gave him an uneasy smile. "No promises, but I'll try." It's all I can do.

[Ryan Hawke]

He smiles. "So are you ready to go now?" She nods and he smiles, and the two of them make their way to the gym.

He stands there, clad only in a white muscle shirt and his fatigues, allowing her a view of his perfectly toned physique.

He stretches before turning to her and smiles. "You ready to go Doctor?"

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

She was not. She'd never be ready for this. Choking back her fear, tasting the memory of the screwdrivers, she said, "Yes."

As with her first bout with Declan, she didn't wait for him. She came at him quick, but at least this time it wasn't a blind charge. She slipped into her offensive posture as she approached, her fists coming up. She tried to fall into her patterns, but she was too afraid and almost choking on the very air she breathed. Every instinct told her to run away from him, but she tried, pushing herself forward. It was only the knowledge that she had to do this to remain in the program kept her going.

[Ryan Hawke]

Ryan saw the telegraphed attack and caught her hand by her wrist, and in a single motion twisted it around and pulled it behind her. "What will you do now? I can do this...."He pulled up on her arm, sending a shot of pain up the entire length from fingertips to shoulder.... "If I do it enough I can dislocate your shoulder."

She was better than Samuel was, but he'd improved since their first spar. She wasn't as good as Simms though. He'd restrained her with minimal effort, trying an easy hold. He didn't know if she wanted him to just grab her, but he figured this would be a good place to start.

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

Hawke felt her stop and think. Her reactions were fast, fast enough for a non-specialist, but not fast enough for him. Still he let her worm out of the hold; it was the best way to assess her strength. It was average, something that Hawke had only seen in Samuel.

She spun quickly, but telegraphed her incoming kick. She never had a chance, and even with her perception, would only be able to catch part of what he did. He grabbed her and her feet left the mat in the same breath; then she was face down, her leg bent behind her and his hand pinning her neck. There was a moment of total stillness from her, as she adapted to her new situation; then Olivia lost her mind.

"No! Let me go! Let me go! Please!" she begged, thrashing against him ineffectually. Then, even in her begging, he felt her start to try to break the hold.

[Ryan Hawke]

"Come on, Doctor, you aren't even giving me a challenge." He continues applying pressure, seending a shooting pain through her pinned leg, and his iron-like grip firm on her neck. "Face it." His tone was hard.

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

Olivia wasn't blindly panicking; she was testing Hawke's iron grips on her - iron grips that weren't giving a millimeter. She fell silent, her words becoming throaty whimpers of fear as she struggled.

She saw an opening after far too long; Hawke was starting to wonder if she'd get it when her boot slammed into his crotch. He was protected, and she wasn't strong enough to really hurt him, but he grunted and released her. She skittered across the room on her hands and knees, slamming her back against the wall. She was breathing too hard, her eyes were too wide and tears wet her cheeks. She stared at him like he was a monster as she fought for control.

[Ryan Hawke]

It hurt being kicked there, even with the cup and his increased toughness. She looked totally inconsolable, and the look in her eyes was what disturbed him most. Abject Fear. It was something he'd never really inspired after such little effort. He walked over to one of the wracks and retrieved two towels. One he kept, the other he tossed to her.

He wasn't suprised when it fell into her lap as opposed to her catching it. He wrapped the towel around his shoulders and knelt down next to her so as to not be as imposing.

"Well I have a guage of how strong you are at any rate. You did well enough considering." His voice was much softer, the tone a big brother would take when consoling a scared younger sister.

"We have alot of work to do before you break that fear of yours, but not today. Calm down, Docotor, we're done for now." He does his best to calm her down, knowing how bad it would look for someone to walk in with her hysterical.

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

Olivia picked up the towel with shaking hands and pressed it to her face. She had heard his words, and her brain was slowly telling her that she was safe. She nodded in pure relief when he said they were done. "Ok," she managed, wiping away her tears. She couldn't wipe away the shakes tormenting her though.

She'd come so close to losing it today. She's felt her control start to give, but she'd handled it. It almost made this worth it. Almost.

"Thank you," she finally said, balling the towel up in her trembling hands.

[The Red Man]

The sound of whistling alerted them both to the newcomer as he pushed open the doors. Both Hawke's and Livy's eyes registered the powerful shape of Sgt. Perault as he came into the gym, his face relaxed under the Raybans... Right up to the point where his face turned to regard the scene: Livy shaking, with tearstains on her face. A large man kneeling beside her. Two minds as one thought the same thing.

Oh shit.

There were two other minds present as well, and in that drawn out moment on the edge of disaster they were having lightning fast discussion.

*Livy! You bastard, Hawke. I'm gonna rip his fuckin' spleen out through his asshole.* The Sgt started towards Ryan and Livy, his movements going from casual to stalking as he paced onto the mat.

*Wait! LOOK at them. He ain't attacking her. It looks like they were training.*

*He made her cry! He's meat.*

*Assess and analyse, dumbshit! Let's see what's happening here.*

"Livy? Are you okay?" Dec's voice was concerned but a little distant, as though he was deliberately trying to abstract what he was seeing. He continued moving forwards though, moving on the balls of his feet, perfectly balanced as he kept his gaze on Hawke.

[Ryan Hawke]

Ryan stands there smiling, intwardly tensing. He'd heard about the Seargeant, and frankly a n uncontrollable element of his skill was dangerous in the extreme. Hwake could read his posture and realized things might not go to pleasantly. He waited for Livy to answer, knowing Declan probably wouldn't believe what he said at the moment. His face was an emotionless mask. He'd done nothing wrong in his mind, having done exactly as she'd asked.

I hate this high school bullshit. Male A feels threatened and comes in about to tear the head off Male B, barely bothers to aks what happened. I'll have to talk to Caine I guess.

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

Olivia rose to her feet quickly with her body language clearly announcing that she'd leap between Hawke and Perault if needed. "Yes, Declan, I'm fine," she said quickly, even as she continue to wipe at her face. "The Major was helping me assess how far I've gotten at overcoming my fears. Major, could you please tell the Sargeant your assessment of my self-control?"

She really didn't want to hear it; she knew the answer was somewhere between 'awful' and 'non-existent'. And her knee was starting to hurt. She casually shifted her weight to her other leg and tried to give the pained one a break. It was just temporary; she'd been pinned before - she would walk it off quickly.

[Ryan Hawke]

Ryan nodded. "She doesn't go catatonic and become helpless, she did fight back after being pinned. That shows that you can still think, even if it's only instinct. You moved like a bat outa hell when I let go, and that's good in a way. You did well in the first hold I bound you with, but the second one where your options were more limited freaked you out bad. You took too long to get out of it."

"Overall I'd say that there's alot of work to be done there Doctor, and if confronted witha squad of men built like the Seargeant and I.." he stressed the rank difference... "You could be a liability in your current state."

"I'm willing to continue helping you with this, because as we seem to play musical teams around here, I want to be able to trust everyone I have to work with."

His voice wasn't mean, but clinical. She'd asked for his honest assesment and he gave it to her, not sugarcoating anything. If you couldn't be honest with yourself, then no one could trust you.

[The Red Man]

Declan stopped moving forwards. Better still from the point of view of those in front of him, his powerful shoulders relaxed and his weight went back onto his heels. His gaze was on Livy, head tilted to one side in an almost feral manner as though he weighed what her and the Major were saying more by tone than by content. As Hawke finished his summation of Livy's progress, the feral cast left the Sergeant's features and he smiled, a warm genuine smile that was so totally at odds with his previous demeanour that Hawke almost wondered if he'd imagined it... almost.

"That's great!" Dec enthused as he closed the rest of the distance amiably. "You fought back, Livy. That's cool. It's all upwards from there." He gave her a hug, remembering at the last minute to make it a comradely, 'buddy' style hug. He turned to the Major.

"Thanks for that, sir." He said with a wide smile, clearly happy as he grinned sideways at Olivia. "I don't seem to be as scary as I used to be, these days."

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

... confronted with a squad of men built... be a liability... took too long... freaked out bad... She could still feel his hand on the back of her neck, and her skin crawled. But Declan's hug was like magic, quieting the tremors.

"Perhaps," she said in a voice raw from her panic, "next time Declan should supervise. He could assess himself. Assess me himself." She tried not to shake at the idea of doing this again. "Good idea or bad idea?"

Each moment was giving her a chance to calm down more, and with Declan in the room, she felt safer. Hawke wasn't a bad guy, but her was setting off her phobia, badly. In fact, if Olivia's read was right, he was a nice guy. But she couldn't get past his appearance.

[Ryan Hawke]

"I wouldn't mind his presence no." Ryan smiles. "This isn't something to be rushed at any rate." he looks at Declan and nods. "Not being scary is a good thing. I'm actually not used to being thought of that way, beyond the fears subordinates have had in the past about dealing with a career officer."

He looks to Olivia. "Please don't take my assessment the wrong way. That you can fight back against a fear so deep is progress. You did well, better than some of the others I've seen around here." He does his best to be friendly about things, realizing She's still moderately freaked out by him.

[The Red Man]

Dec considered Livy's proposal for a moment, his smile fading as he realised that, by watching her learn to overcome this fear he would have to watch her afraid, crying and screaming... and not be able to do anything about it. Livy saw his jaw tighten for a moment, his brow over the Raybans furrowing.

"I guess it'd be a good idea." He said slowly, thinking through his words. He might have to watch Livy get roughed up one day, might have to watch and do nothing because to do something would be to get everyone killed.

*Yeah, getting yanked around as a prisoner? Sure. If some of those Ghengis wannabes or assholes like them want to get their jollies with Livy while we're watching, though, screw the tactical situation. We kill every motherfucker in the tent.*

*Yeah, not arguin' with that assessment. Some things we ain't standing by and watchin'.* Dec nodded, both in agreement with Olivia and with his alter-ego.

"Sure, I can sit in." He smiled a little forcedly. "I think it'd be useful for me as Livy's trainer, since we can go over the holds you use in our next practice, sir." He looked at Livy. "That way, we can get you used to reacting right so you don't have time to panic. Yeah." He nodded a little more positively. "That works for me."

[z-Olivia Jenings-Izumi]

"I have a thing... about being grabbed around the neck," Olivia admitted, softly. "It kinda overrides my thought processes and sends me right into fear mode. You kinda hit a really bad trigger on me. So that's probably my final goal: not panicking when a hand is on my neck, front or back." She didn't like telling him that, but he should know.

And you, girl - no more doing stuff like this without telling someone. Olivia was too aware of how startling Declan could result in injury or death for someone. For him to go apeshit on a superior officer would be disastrous, and it was a good reminder of how close it could be with a man who walked hand-in-hand with his rage.

It seemed to be turning out for the best. Declan seemed to think that this would be beneficial, and while she agreed with him, she was also aware how rough it would be on her. It would be better in simulation, where her failure to hold it together wouldn't mean the chance of being a liability for her team. She couldn't let that happen; if she could get around that, she needed to do so.

"So maybe once a month?" Olivia asked, wishing she could stretch it out further than that. "What do you say, Major?" She offered her hand with a tremulous smile.

[Ryan Hawke]

Ryan nods. "Once a month will be fine. I look forward to seeing you beat this." He smiles, "You know It's nice getting to meet people from the other teams. Thus far my team's been keeping to itself. I'll have to see if I can get the rest of them to mingle abit more."

He nods to Declan and Olivia. "If you two need anything more I'll be over in the weight room, if not, have a good day."