Scion: Legends of the Wild West - Divine Labor #3: The Fate of Fools

[Ouroboros]

It's April Fool's day so this one is a gimme: Make me laugh.

How? Tell me a joke. Write a funny (short) story. Or design a goofy funny relic, boon, or other birthright. So long as its Scion related and funny you'll get the reward.

What's it worth to you? 5 exp.

Awarded:

Liv

Cherry

[z-Olivia Jennings]

FROMAGE

This Purview covers the karmic power of cheese. It molds and melts to the contours of Fate, allowing the Scion to just be… utterly ridiculous.

Associated With: The Giant Yellow Chicken, Bruce Lee, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Bruce Willis Chuck Norris and Sarah Palin

I WIN (FROMAGE ●)

Dice Pool: none

Cost: None (as if!)

Scions who possess this Purview cannot fail. The concept behind the Purview is that failure is not only not an option; it’s not even on the table – except as dinner. When the Scion activates this power, they gain the ability to tell the Storyteller to get fucked. Any failed rolls for the rest of that scene become automatic successes; botches are ignored. If the Scion succeeds on the merit of their roll alone, the rolled successes double. All Stunts triple the number of rolled successes. Finally, the Scion can assume that they look cool as hell on the affected action, regardless of the roll.

I’M SHINY! (FROMAGE ● ●)

Dice Pool: Unnecessary

Cost: None (duh!)

The masters of Fromage (and all users of Fromage are masters of the Purview) are always loved. If another being, whether it is a Scion, human or even Titan, expresses a dislike of the Scion, they are automatically struck by the power of Fromage. They instantly lose access to all Boons and Knacks, their Relics lose power, their Followers abandon them, their Guide mocks them and their Creatures take dumps in their shoes. They also start to smell bad as their body begins to omit copious levels of B.O. These effects last until the affected target realizes their error and returns to adoring of the master of Fromage.

MASTER OF ALL (FROMAGE ● ● ●)

Dice Pool: Must you ask?

Cost: None (you should have the idea by now)

This is the final level of Fromage and the greatest of powers. Like I’m Shiny, it grants the Scion limitless adoration but not just from characters in the game. At this level, the Scion can demand love and appreciation from the players and the Storyteller. Even the Scion’s own player worships the Scion, often going to extreme lengths to protect and preserve the Scion from harm. With enough successes, the player will knife their own mother to save the Scion.

There are rumored to be higher levels of Fromage, but God wouldn’t allow them to be printed in DemiGod or God for fear of what would happen to the Universe.

[Ouroboros]

Awarded.

As a side note I need to not review this while eating...

[Cherry]

Puff (Guide *****)

The Magic Dragon

Very few dragons in the history of the World have been famous enough to have a name. Abraxas, Fafnir, Jormungandr, Ladon, Ryujin, Typhon, and of course Nessie; these are some of the most famous dragons known to man. But the Legends of all of them pale in comparison to that of one dragon who, unlike most of his kind, has not gained fame by destroying the countryside or terrorizing livestock but by simply finding a way to (in his own words) “muddle through”.

That dragon goes by the name of Puff, the Magic Dragon.

His origins are as mysterious as that of most other dragons, but it is Puff’s rise to fame that is truly remarkable. In 1959 a man name Leonard Lipton typed out the words to a poem entitled Puff, the Magic Dragon using a typewriter belonging to his friend’s housemate, and then promptly forgot all about it. He forgot about it so promptly, in fact, that he left the page it had been typed upon in the typewriter, where it was later found by his friend’s housemate – a man named Peter Yarrow. Mr. Yarrow would later become famous himself as a member of the group Peter, Paul and Mary, whose recording of Puff, the Magic Dragon would climb to the top of the charts in the year of its release and subsequently become so widely known as to make its subject a part of Pop Culture.

And so, while the average man on the street may not recognize the name ‘Drachenstein’, virtually everyone knows the name of Puff (the Magic Dragon).

These days the Magic Dragon spends most of his time by the sea in his own Overworld realm of Honalee, a land that is as far away as “your fondest hope”, and as near as “your sweetest dream”. There he frolics within the mists of autumn and plays along the famous and much-loved Cherry Lane. However he periodically sets out to find lost souls in need of aid, or just little boys or girls looking for an adventure, whom he takes on fantastic quests throughout the Overworlds and beyond.

Attributes: Strength 12, Dexterity 5, Stamina 12, Charisma 6, Manipulation 4, Appearance 3, Perception 7, Intelligence 4, Wits 6

Virtues: Conviction 3, Endurance 2, Expression 4, Harmony 2

Abilities: Animal Ken 2, Art 4, Athletics 2, Awareness 5, Brawl 1, Craft (Magic Constructs) 3, Empathy 3, Fortitude 3, Integrity 4, Medicine 2, Occult 2, Presence 3, Stealth 1, Survival 2

Supernatural Powers:

Boons: Eye of the Storm, Hornet’s Nest, Unlikely Pattern, Unintended Purpose, Green Thumb, Cleanse, Bless or Blight, The Subtle Knife, Fool’s Gold, Dreamcraft, Fantastic Voyage, Dreamworld, Tranquility, Unerring Orientation, Unbarred Entry, Come Along, Terra Incognita, Rainbow Bridge, Otherworldly Portal

Epic Attributes: Epic Strength 3 (All Knacks listed in Scion: Hero), Epic Stamina 3 (All Knacks listed in Scion: Hero), Epic Charisma 3 (Inspirational Figure, Hapless Cool, Paragon of Virtue), Epic Perception 4 (Unfailing Recognition, Real McCoy, Scent the Divine, Fool Me Once), Epic Wits 2 (Psychic Profiler, Don’t Read the Manual)

Little Jackie Paper: This unique ability resembles a bizarre cross between the Animal Purview’s Paper Tiger boon and the Waking Zombie boon used by the Loa. With it, Puff can take the still-living spirit out of an unconscious or otherwise helpless mortal subject (victim?) and transfer it into an artistic representation of that individual, which then springs to life with all of the memories and traits of the original. To use this ability, Puff must first create an artistic representation of the subject (which is usually done as a drawing or painting). Doing so requires a Wits + Art roll. Then the Magic Dragon must blow on the left ear of the subject (blowing on the right has no effect, and this power is useless on any individual who is missing their left ear, or whose left ear is otherwise inaccessible) and spend 1 Willpower point and 5 Legend Points. The subject’s Player may resist with a (Willpower + Integrity + Legend) roll, with Puff’s successes on the original Art roll representing the difficulty they must beat. If successful, the Subject’s living spirit is transferred out of their body and into the artistic representation of them, which promptly springs to life as a seemingly exact duplicate of them in all respects. The duplicate has all of their memories, attributes, abilities, etc., and is in essentially unchanged in all respects save one: they may now safely enter the Over- or Underworlds of the Gods without suffering any inherent ill effects. They can still suffer damage from attacks, environmental effects, and the like, but simply being in the Over- or Underworld is not enough to cause them harm. Additionally, the subject gains a Legend score of 1 (if they already had a Legend score, of equal or higher value, it remains unchanged).

This power only works on mortals, not on Scions, Titanspawn, or other supernatural creatures, or on mundane animals. The duration of this power is permanent, or until Puff chooses to turn it off.

Spells: All of the good ones, none of the bad ones (up to the 8 dot level, of course).

Tough Hide: All dragons are incredibly tough and resilient, doubling the bashing and lethal soak values obtained

from Stamina before Epic Stamina is applied.

Join Battle: 11[2]

Attacks:

Bite: Accuracy 7, Damage 18L, Parry DV —, Speed 5

Clinch: Accuracy 6, Damage 13L, Parry DV —, Speed 6

Soak: 3A/16L/28B

Health Levels: -0x15/Incap

Dodge DV: 8

Willpower: 5

Legend: 9

Legend Points: 81

[Ouroboros]

ignore me