World of Darkness World of Darkness: Attrition - The Order (Part 1) (Finished)

[Adrian Moss]

“Welcome Slave.”

What he meant to say was ‘Welcome back Slave.’ The whole slave title was one of the reasons I had walked away from my sire’s teachings the second his back was turned. Or, in my more cowardly way, I had slunk away, not actually left. In reality I had missed most of a year’s worth of meetings and the opportunity to be pushed around and sent on meaningless (to me) and possibly dangerous missions for my Betters in the Order. Yeah, it had looked so much like fun back then.

Why was I back? Well, the most pressing reason was that my sire and benefactor told me to, but there was something else. Maybe it was meeting with the werewolves, or Sarah. Maybe as dense as I was, I wanted something more than the typical life of the Undead. I wasn’t one who took naturally to finding answers outside of me, either. Bernard had drummed self-reliance into me, or maybe he had found it there and built on it.

“I am Thomas, Initiate of the Untamed Void.”

I reached back to my first nights in the Ordo to figure out what that was. I couldn’t. I needed a refresher course, but this wasn’t the guy to ask.

“I will be your Watcher. That means, if you have a problem, you come to me. If you need something, you come to me. If someone asks you to do something you don’t understand, you come to me.”

Of course, all of that was a lie. As a mentor-less Slave, I was pretty much anyone’s to punt. My Watcher was really there to make sure I made myself available. A good Watcher would actually look after me somewhat. A bad one would forget my name the moment I walked out the door. I had had a bad one the first time around.

He took me into his study and told me to sit down.

“You know that any senior member can ask a service of you at any time, right?”

He didn’t look up from his computer screen.

“Until you find a mentor – a shield to keep you safe – you will have to do so that you learn what we are about. You have to start at the foundation of what makes us an Order. You must learn to work toward a greater whole. You must learn that to transcend you must first be forged by work and deed. Your own goals and ambitions must be folded into the success of the Ordo. Is this clear?”

I nod.

He looks up and gives me a measuring stare.

“Now, I have a task for you. There is a property that I am looking into for my research. I suspect it is haunted, but you will go and make sure that it is. You have three days. Note that your report will be seen by others, Supplicants and up. How –if- you handle this will follow you through the halls of the Ordo. Three days, Slave Adrian.”

“I, um …”

“I am downloading the address to your cell phone.”

“Okay.”

I got the sense that my interview was over. I got up and left. Once I was out of the room I checked the phone. Sure enough I had the address. More importantly I had my detective gear in my car. There was no time like the present.

[Adrian Moss]

So I find myself going through this house. I had to crawl through a broken window whose board was loose. I have my camcorder and flashlight, plus my eyes and ears are on full tilt. It is kind of creepy hearing my feet press down on the rotten carpet. I can feel the fabric crumble beneath my feet. It’s dark in here, but my eyes are getting by just fine. Moon’s just risen up and there isn’t too much of it. Funny how I now sense these things – so much moonlight equals so much visibility. I like it.

The place is bare of most of its furniture. The kitchen looks empty and I’m not sure why I’m searching it.

No … don’t touch me.

I stop. The sound was terribly faint – hardly in the audible range. It feels like it is coming from behind me. The hairs stand up on my neck and I realize it’s gotten somewhat colder in here. Spooky.

I retrace my steps to the den then around to the bedrooms. I swear I can see something moving through the mold spores that pass for dust here. Of course, I’m a bit scared as well. What can a ghost do to me? I really don’t know. I recall Sleepy Hallow were the ghost cuts off freaking heads. Not a good thought for me right about now.

No … don’t touch me. the voice pleads. This time it’s clear. A girl’s voice, or maybe a young woman’s and it’s a tired cry. What is freaky or freakier is that it is coming from all around me. Yes it has gotten colder and there is a real sense of despair, sorrow, and … hopelessness, but all that pales to the reality that I can’t pinpoint the direction the sound is coming from. All my enhanced hearing is telling me that it is coming from all around right were I’m standing.

I’m afraid. I run. I don’t quite jump out the window, but I do a real good impression of a panic. I stop when I reach my car. If I could, I would be panting. As it is, I haven’t been followed by whatever scared the crap out of me, but I can’t think straight. When I can’t think straight, I usually go for someone to talk to until my mind settles. I’m too wired to call Erica and this isn’t something I want to bring Gwen into. That leaves CalNet were I will either find some students I can bounce stuff off of, or my various acquaintances. As it turns out, I luck out. Sarah is there with some guy called No-Moss. Sarah vouches for him somewhat.

My problem is laid out to the best of my ability, considering I need to keep the location and the identity of my employer a secret. We go over the situation and they talk me back in. Okay, really I wanted to go back in and needed little prodding. This time, I handled it like a real investigation. I treated it like a crime scene. I got nowhere.

I’m a bit depressed when I get back to the car. This time there was no voices and no leads to track down. I find myself going over my initial camcorder pics. How I missed it the first time is beyond me. I see a belt and a bundled rag in one of the back bedrooms. I go back in and check it out. This time I feel something. No voice, but a definite chill in the air. Man, I love my increased sense of touch. It’s really handy in catching temperature and wind shifts. When the shift has no external source it is well … a haunting right.

Now I’m back to finding out more information on the web. I had done a good bit before going in, but had found nothing useful. Now I’m reaching out on a hunch. I start reaching back to ten years ago and search info in the LA Times on the area. It takes me about a half an hour, but my hunch pays off. There was as series of murders in the area. The murder grabbed teenage girls and murdered them in vacant houses before dumping the bodies elsewhere. He used a belt and a rag soaked in chloroform. This is my guy and thus my victim. For a moment I feel real compassion for the victim. What can I do about releasing her? Then it occurs to me that would void my purpose for coming here. It’s a hard choice and I think about it a bit.

I log off without making a decision. I’m going to become something different if I keep doing what the Ordo wants. That realization hits me. The Ordo is about changing who you are. If I stay I’m going to change.

I’m going to stay.

I’m going to change and I’m going to have to accept those changes. My core values are going to remain the same, but how I maintain them is going to have to change. I want to help people, but I am not going to be able to do it as a man who happens to be a vampire. I have to do it as a vampire and I need to know what that really is.

I look at my work and I know what else I am going to end up doing. It’s what a vampire would do.

[Adrian Moss]

I called Gwen, despite the lateness of the hour. She was sleepy, but happy to hear from me, as always. Her voice had a pathetic, needy quality to it. It made me feel bad to be using her the way I was. It would get worse.

She was up with a half a cup of coffee in her when I got to her place. I went in with my lap top and camcorder. I rang the bell and she came quickly to the door. We kissed deeply the moment we got in. Thank god for breath mints. I could taste the coffee on her, plus the sweat of sleep. I hugged her lightly and made my way past her.

“What’s wrong, honey?”

“I’ve got a report I need help with. It has to look good – formal – and I need it done soon.”

I look at her in a way I know I’ll never repeat. She’s not going to be the same if I have my way. Our relationship will never be the same.

“Gwen, I want our relationship to change.”

She stops what she’s doing and stares at me. I swear I see hope in her eyes. She knows that I keep secrets from her and it has been eating her up inside to know I keep her out of part of my life. That’s about to change, but I can’t tell her the price. Life isn’t fair like that. If I tell her and she freaks, the Rules say I need to kill her. I can’t bear to do that. I imagine I could just leave her. That would break her heart, but she would get over it … but I would lose her. I can’t stand that either.

I walk into the kitchen. I pull out a glass and then, out of sight, I bite into my wrist. This is decision time. I can still save her free will and walk out that door.

I don’t. There are numerous reasons, but in the end I think it’s because I’ve begun valuing my life more and others just a little less. My future comes first. It makes me want to cry tears of blood, but it doesn’t make me stop.

She has followed me to the edge of the kitchen.

“Adrian, what is it? What do you want to change?”

She’s hopeful and fearful at the same time.

I turn to her and all but hurl the glass full of vitae at her.

“Here. Drink this.”

“What is it?” She’s confused and fearful. She is so easy for me to read.

“Drink it. Trust me and drink it. Then I can make everything clear.”

She hesitates. I see her eyes pleading with me to be honest with her, to be kind to her, to protect her. I can’t do those things. Not really.

She drinks. First tentatively then fully she drained it. I take the glass out of her hand and put it on the table. I then lead her to the sofa and sit down facing her. I take a deep, pointless breath.

“Gwen, I am Adrian Moss of Clan Mekhet and I am a Vampire,” I begin and Gwen joins me in the world of Darkness in which I dwell.