World of Darkness World of Darkness: Attrition - Christmas (Christmas) (Finished)

[Adrian Moss]

I come home from Gwen’s place feeling good this Christmas Eve. I had been a bit leery having her stay at her apartment just for me. I’ve never had that kind of devotion from a girl before. Hell, I’ve never had that level of interest from anybody.

Gwen got me a California Criminal Code for 2009 on CD for Christmas. I got her lingerie, a wonderful little black and green number that brings out her eyes. Okay, I went to Victoria Secrets and asked one of those thin and beautiful sales clerks to help me. Gwen acted like she liked it. Apparently none of her previous boyfriends had got her something like that. Wait does this make me her boyfriend? I don’t know how I feel about that.

Well, she was heading over to her about now and I was heading home to my empty Christmas. My first Christmas alone and I hadn’t even bothered to decorate, or get a tree. On second thought, putting a fire hazard like a Christmas tree in my house would probably be a bad idea.

As I drive down the street to my house, I marvel at the lights that my neighbors have put out. It looks like a lot of work and it certainly puts me in a more festive and seasonal mood. Maybe I’ll put up some lights next year, right after a nightly feeding, of course. I’m not sure what the lights will do for me. It all seems a bit wasteful and silly. It doesn’t help me survive … or does it? Life is more than feeding. I got to keep telling myself that.

There is a car in my driveway. I check it over as I get out, overly cautious. It’s a rental, from one of those places by the airport. Who would want to visit me from out of town? I have few enough friends in town. The engine is warm, so it hasn’t been here long. The driver side door is unlocked while the passenger and both rear doors are locked. I quietly open the door and smell inside. I know who it is, though I’m pretty stunned.

I stroll up the walk way, am about to take my keys out then I stop and try the door. It’s unlocked. The Stranger has unlocked my door. I go in. Nothing to it really, as were else would I go? This is my home, my Haven, my place of sanctuary and safety.

I think about saying something witty like ‘Honey, I’m home!’ but it falls flat in my mouth. The Stranger wouldn’t appreciate the humor. From what I remember, the Stranger isn’t much in the mood for anything I think, or say. There is little for me to do but walk in and meet my Sire.

I don’t have to go far. I find him in my living room which is, well, right inside my entry way. He is sitting in one of my comfy chairs, smoking a cigarette – horrid flame and all – and watching TV – something seasonal and suitably comforting. Something deep down in me wants to kill him.

“Hello Bernard.”

[Adrian Moss]

It’s Bernard. Not Mr. Vickers, Vickers, or Bernie, but Bernard. He’s my sire after all and we have to keep these things formal and straight. He may be Ordo Dracul, but my sire likes a certain level of formality between us. Orderly like the way he likes his life. Hell, he may just have something right with that seeing as he’s approaching 100 years of unlife.

He smiles a bit a gives me a recognizing nod.

“Welcome Adrian. Your home looks to be in good order.”

Like he expects me to let it turn to a hole in the ground. I say nothing.

“I hope you don’t mind me letting myself in. Waiting outside seemed so … odd. Besides, I paid for this, didn’t I?”

“Yes, you did. I’ve been keeping the rest of my expenditures pretty reasonable though. Well, outside the cars, but you know about them too.”

He nods.

“What do I owe this unexpected visit?” I ask as humbly as possible while I choke down the bestial rage that comes from finding someone in your home. I know it isn’t about my sire. I know him well enough to know he could kill me without trying too hard. The anger is dying down.

“I had planned to come back anyway, but I’ve received word of what you have been up to. The Invictus? Really?”

That hangs in the air a second before I respond.

“I’ve had to make choices concerning my continued survival.”

“But the Invictus will just use you and laugh at your ashes. There is nothing redeemable about them.”

“It beats living alone.”

“There was the Ordo, Adrian. You should have pursued my contacts with them. Transcendence is the way I set out for you, if you would just show the vision to take it.”

I laugh at him. Honestly, I laugh at him before I can stop myself. The responding look is chilling to say the least.

“Your vision, not mine. Right now I have to live in this city and follow my own path. That involves dealing with other kindred in some kind of ordered structure. For me, that means the Westwood coterie and that means Invictus. The Ordo wasn’t providing that for me. Truth be told, I never gave them a chance, because what I want is the semblance of a life. I want to be a PI with mortals beside me. I want the life I was denied when I was alive.”

Hard eyes held me for a few seconds. He took a drag on his cigarette and I felt the Beast pull on its leash again. Slowly a light came to those eyes as the ashes cooled close to his fingers – his gloved fingers.

“You’ve made progress. I’m not so sure about the ‘mortals beside me’ aspect of your aspirations, but I’m pleased that you’ve finally learned some level of self-confidence. My absence seems to have done you some good.”

I think this was the kindest words my sire had ever said to me. For once I didn’t feel like a total failure in his elder eyes.

“I want you to follow up with the Ordo Dracul members I gave you an introduction to” he continued. “I still pay your bills and am responsible for your behavior. You don’t have to give up your new … friends, but you need to know more about the vampiric condition than they can teach.”

He stood up and tossed the cigarette idly into my fireplace. He looks at me again. It’s a different look from what I normally have come to expect. I want to say it is a look of approval, but maybe that’s just the season getting to me. I walk him to the door and we say our goodbyes. He never bothers to shake my hand, but for the first time I have a hope that one day I will.

Merry Christmas.