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[OpNet] Buck Naked and Burning


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Dear Abbie,

I gained the power to fly went I was forced to jump from a burning building. Only problem is that when I do fly burning wings sprout from my back vaporizing everything I am wearing and usually hurting someone. I am a paramedic and the flight power could be of great help to me in my job if it wasn't so destructive, not to mention embarrassing. Is there any way to shut off the burning power?

I have heard of a doctor who claims he can shut off certain nova powers and taint related conditions by amputating the parts of the MR node. What do you think? Should I give him a shot?

- Buck Naked and Burning

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Dear Buck Naked and Burning,

NO! Absolutely Not! This "procedure" is illegal, unethical, experimental, unprofessional, and way beyond dangerous. And that assumes this is even on the up and up, which I doubt. You let him give you a shot and you will likely be turned into illegal nova pharmaceuticals, specifically soma. If you have a way to contact this nut I suggest you turn him over to Project Utopia, the police, or perhaps even the Teragen.

As for your problem with burning, either learn to attune objects or wear tougher clothing.

- Abby

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