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[OpNet] Mr. Large


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Dear Abbie,

My muscles are now too large for me to perform properly. I'm not able to fulfill my wife properly any more. Can you please help me?

- Mr. Large

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Dear Mr. Large,

It really depends upon why you can't fulfill your wife's sexual needs. Either you are afraid that you will hurt her or your muscles are so large that they prevent your member from protruding enough. I do have some advice either way, though. There are some great tantric schools of thought that can teach truly enriching sex without much use of male organs for people such as you. I fail to see who is enriched by sex without the big "O", but some new age folks swear by it. If the spiritual thing is not your cup o' java, then I would heartily recommend that you report to your local Rashoud Clinic and see about being treated for you condition. If you are truly concerned more about your wife than yourself, then there are always extensions.

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