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Mutants & Masterminds: The Unlikely Prophets - The Unlikely Prophets Christmas Special


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It is the end of the year.

The Unlikely Prophets are all gathered at Jack's house in the Australian outback.

They recently discovered that Jack, ever the rebel, celebrates Christmas - the long-forbidden holiday celebrating peace on Earth and goodwill towards mankind (both of which have been forbidden by Order Executive Decision no.9182.)

So the house is decorated - badly, as if by a blind man - and Jack and the rest of the Prophets are enjoying the warm Australian summer and a cold glass of beer-nog (like eggnog but with less egg and more beer.)

They are partaking in whatever Christmas traditions they have heard vague, second-hand accounts of - or ignoring the whole silly thing if they're not of good cheer.

Of course, nothing could possibly interrupt the group's festivities on the night before Christmas. Right?

Click to reveal..
So as you can see, I'm doing something a little special for the holiday season.

This thread is not canon, and not serious. At all. AT. ALL. This is rather a side story in the spirit of those cheesy Christmas specials we drown in at this time of the year. All players in my game are welcome. If this goes well, your characters back in continuity might find themselves with a special Christmas bonus... so break out the tinsel and be of good cheer.

This thread will be UPdated on the usual days (Tuesday, Friday) over the holiday season. There will be no real dice rolling (all narrated) and it will move pretty fast.

Take care, and have fun, and remember: the Order is forever (but so is the Christmas spirit.)
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The Necronaut was in the kitchen. His mask was on, in addition to a bright red baseball cap. He had also augmented his usual outfit with dingy looking red suspenders.

He hunched over a pile of salvaged ammunition, painstakingly peeling the cases off of the bullets and emptying their propellant onto sheets of red construction paper.

"If anyone wants to help make firecrackers, they're welcome!" He offered cheerfully. "I hear they're supposed to scare off evil Christmas spirits. Or, hm, maybe it was new-years spirits."

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Glitch was in costume, but the only element of his mask that was on his face was his sensor visor. He carried a large pot containing a great deal of soil and a green plant, that was mistletoe, as he set it down in the living room and began to take cuttings of plants and string to hang up from the ceiling and other fixtures.

It hissed at him. Glitch sighed. Apparently the genetic cloning and alteration process had made it unstable.

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Gloom had been quiet throughout the festivities. The truth was that she was feeling awkward. She often felt like she didn’t belong, especially since her joining with Darkness, but it was worse when people wanted to include her. It made it awkward when they tried.

She rose to her feet, both to get away from the hissing plant and to move off the couch. “Goin’ out,” she rasped.

“Where?” Radiance asked, caught in mid-laugh from a joke Jack had told.

“Just out,” Gloom said, stepping out into the hot Australian summer. She winced against the bright light and moved to the shade of the house, sighing. Crossing her arms, she stared out at the hot desert sun. Idly, she watched the wind blow and wished that she had a cigarette or something.

“Hey.” Jumping, Gloom turned to see a thin woman leaning against the wall next to her. She was blonde and dressed in a slutty green and red dress. But that was ragged and dirty, and her hands were handcuffed together.

Gloom eyed her suspiciously. “Who and what are you besides a dime-store hooker?”

“I’m Christmas of the Past,” she said. “Call me Chris, sweetie.”

“The… Right,” Gloom rasped, rolling her eyes. “I didn’t know there were any mental hospitals near here.”

“I’m a ghost, not like the ones the your ghosty friend deals with, either,” Chris said. “I say ghost, but ‘spirit’ is more right.”

“How can you be the spirit of something that doesn’t exist?” Gloom huffed.

“I do actually,” Chris said, “because I’m the spirit of Christmases past, Toots.” She rolled her eyes at Gloom before grabbing her wrist and saying, “And I’m going to show you what it used to be about.” There was a pop and then they were both gone.

In the past…

Gloom blinked as they reappeared in the center of a Seattle mall. She recognized it, but only barely. The technological advances she was so used to were gone; this was like the set of some movie set in the past. Only it was real – she could feel that. Then she realized that she was here in all her four-armed glory. She started to panic, only to calm down when she realized that no one was reacting.

“You can’t be seen,” Chris told her. The ‘ghost’ looked better here; her dress was clean and she looked happier. The handcuffs were gone, too. “The people can’t see us.”

Gloom snorted. “No, really? I figured that people were used to four-armed women running around Seattle,” she said. Chris shrugged and didn’t answer, allowing Gloom to look around the area. It was cheerful: lovely decorations made of green and red and sparkles and little lights created a jolly atmosphere. It was all a little off-putting to the woman who’d grown up in the Order’s tender care. Still, there was something in the air that made Gloom relax, too. Something… sweet and gentle.

“Want to see your parents?” Chris asked suddenly.

Gloom stiffened before turning to the spirit slowly. “You… can do that?”

“Sure,” Chris said, and the world shifted around them again. Now they were in a living room that Gloom had never seen. It was decorated like the mall had been, though an evergreen tree filled one corner. Brightly wrapped gifts were piled under it.

A high-pitched shriek caught her attention as a small girl with strawberry blonde hair rushed into the room, dropping to her knees next to the tree. “Lookit!” she cried, pointing down at a package about as big as her head. “That’s mine!”

“Mom?” Gloom said, feeling her throat close with tears.

Two adults and three more kids came in; all were clearly related, though Gloom’s mother was the youngest. She watched as the family came together and started to open gifts together. Soft music about peace and love filled the background while the warmth and joy of the family filled the foreground. “That’s what Christmas with a family is like,” Chris told her.

“What about Dad?” Gloom asked.

The world shifted again, and Gloom blinked as she found herself on a beach. It was warm here; warmer than it had been in Seattle. Presents were stacked under a decorated palm tree while another family – this time made up of more than just the nuclear unit – gathered around a firepit and sang carols. Someone had a guitar, and the ocean kept the rhythm as the family sang the same songs she’d heard in the other house.

Gloom walked around unlike she found her father, kneeling before him. “Dad?” she whispered, watching the teen boy sway back and forth with other members of his family. He looked happy – happier than Gloom could ever remember him being. There was something special here – something her world didn’t have.

“Time to go back,” Chris said, her voice firm but gentle.

“No please, just a bit longer,” Gloom asked, but the world was already shifting, and she was back outside Jack’s house, staring at Ayer’s Rock.

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It seemed that Bodhie was the only one proficient at cooking meals for the entire gang. That resulted in her spending more time in the kitchen than she actually wanted or liked... and she had to admit it felt a bit like being back home with her hated husband. She checked the oven having prepared a mixture of cookies made from the scraps of ingredients she could find in Jacks house. Inwardly she cursed herself for doing the same chores she did at home... and counting calories at the same time while reading the nutrition facts of the ingredients she had used.

„Old habits die hard... eh“, she said to herself estimating the cookies would still need a few minutes. Given her large frame Bodhie had to move carefully through the house or she may accidently bump into a wall... which would easily give away. She was still adjusting to her increased mass and most of all strength and moved slowly and mindful of her every step.

Eyeing Glitch’s plant suspiciously the large female bodybuilder raised an eyebrow and asked the obvious, „What the... bloody hell is that?“

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Originally Posted By: Bodhie Armstrong

Eyeing Glitch’s plant suspiciously the large female bodybuilder raised an eyebrow and asked the obvious, „What the... bloody hell is that?“

"It's supposed to be mistletoe." Glitch looked somewhat embarrassed, under the stares and curious looks of everyone- save Jack who was still glancing blindly around to see what the heck everyone else was seeing. "Supposed to be?" Bodhie demanded, glare getting very, very hard.

Glitch groaned and began his explanation, sheepish as it was. "Mistletoe is supposed to be festive and symbolic or something, as I understood, except that the Order pretty much eradicated whatever plants they could find, courtesy of the Druid, though she was reluctant about that... I did some hacking. Anyway, I recovered an incomplete genetic profile. I've been cloning and altering local plants to provide a facsimile."

Another glance at the clipped off hanging segments and the shifting and hissing plant. "Well-" he nervously chuckled, "I don't think it'll become an intelligent life form."
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Sharatur tried to resist. She really did. But the decorations were wrong! It was driving her batty, she couldn't get them out of her head, she was actually starting to twitch. She got a stepladder and went after the higher ones, fixing them so they were arranged right--or at least, right side up.

Sharatur was half an hour into the process, hauling the ladder over to another spot, when she frowned. "I'm doing it again! Jeez!" She set the ladder aside, and simply stepped up into the air to get at the decorations. "How did you get all this done in so short a time, anyway?" she asked. Once she combined superspeed, airwalking, and teleportation, things went really fast. Less than half an hour later, she was done.

She took a quick survey of her work. "There. Much better." Then she slapped the hissing mistletoe with one hand. "Bad freaky demon plant! Stop that!" She plunked herself down on the couch to relax with a pleased sigh. Looked at her hand. Made a face. "I...ew. I think that thing pollinated me! Is it supposed to do that?" She wiped her hand on Glitch's arm.

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"It means it likes you," suggested Hex absently as she strolled in. As usual, the Book of Keys was open in her hands and she was reading from it even while walking around. Somehow she managed to avoid obstacles though...maybe she caught their refractions in her glasses.

"You know, most of the traditions in this are pagan," Larissa commented, "but it looks like a lot of the origins of the old, pre-Order holiday have their roots in pagan winter solstice rites too. I was thinking we can use them to reconstruct the holiday from its ancient roots."

She paused and looked up. "Minus the human sacrifice, of course."

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"Well, glad to see we've all managed to take a day off from fighting against the Order and trying to restore liberty to our beleaguered world. You know, out here in the Australian outback, we don't get many visoters around Christmas time, or any time for that matter, so I expect that the eight of us will be making up a full house..."

Blackjack was talking to a point in the middle distance, as if there was an invisible camera filming him and invisible people watching. His beer-nog had a half-eaten candy cane sticking out of it, made out of home spun sugar. Since Blackjack was blind, it was a slightly yellow hue with no stripes, but he liked it well enough.

"And soon it'll be Christmas and time to open up out - "

There was the sound of a doorbell ringing.

With a pregnant pause, Blackjack spoke. "Why - who could that be, at the door?" He turned towards the door, making his way through decorations and his allies, and opened the door.

"Who is it?"

* * *

Outside, not far off, a swirl of dust brought another apparition to Gloom's side. It was a vision of an obese man with a bushy beard wearing a wreath on his head and long festive robes, a large turkey under one arm.

He took the wreath off and tossed it aside. "M'not wearing that thing any more. It's itchy. Hi, Andi. And Darkness." He waved to the shadow organism living inside of Andi's skin. "I'm the Ghost of Christmas Present. And to find out what's going on in Christmas Present, we need to travel to the far, far away land of - Australia."

He paused, catching Andi's look. "Oh, we're already there. Okay, look over at Jack's house for a vision of Christmas present. See you 'round." With a puff of dust, he was gone.

Gloom looked over at Jack's house, then up in the sky as an apparition descended from the sky.

It was such a bizarre sight that by the time Andi had regained her presence of mind, it had already rung the doorbell.

* * *

Standing in the doorway was a reindeer-man.

There was probably a more politically correct name, like Antlered-American, but that's what he looked like. A large, burly man covered in fur with a small bushy tail and antlers on his head.

He was wearing a harness and a thong, ad the harness had bells on. He caught looks off those present, and huffed. "Hey, Santa lets us openly serve. Don't judge." His nose glowed red for emphasis.

"Santa?" Blackjack arched an eyebrow.

"Yeah. Listen, this is where the superheroes are at, right? We have an important special mission for you. Santa's been kidnapped!"

"Santa's real?"

"Says the blind guy who finds super-people with playing cards. Yes, Santa's real. But he's been held captive at the North Pole for thirty years! All this time, no child on Christmas Day has gotten what they asked for! I only just managed to escape with the help of the Special Australian Santa Squad, or SASS, and I came to see if you'd help!"

"How'd you find us?"

"I used the WYS/WYA Awareness System. Listen, if we rescue him, then Christmas can finally return - for everyone! Not just you! I'll lead you there myself! I, Rudolph - rr-logo.png"

"How'd you do that?" ask Blackjack.

"Do what?"

"Say your name in a logo like that? I been trying but it never comes out right."

"That's not important right now! Will you come with me? The SASS can take you there!"

The Red Reindeer stood aside to reveal the SASS - which apparently was composed of a sleigh with a cup holder in it, a spacious trunk, and harnessed to it, six snow-white kangaroo people, three male and three female. Also in thongs and harnesses.

"With your uncanny powers and my laser-nose, we'll be there in the blink of an eye! And then - finally - Christmas will be saved!"

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Hikari for her part had been painting in the room she appropriated as hers. If Painting was what it could be called. She was painting with light itself, trying to capture the Spirit of Christmas, as she'd envisioned the description she'd gotten from Jack.

The arrival of Rudolph brough her out of her trance-like state if only to find out what was going on.

"Okay the hissing plant and discussion were one thing but can you people explain what..all. the noise..." She trailed off at seeing the Reindeer.

"What the hell." She nodded "Sign me up, my work was going nowhere anyway."

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Sharatur's head poked around the side of Blackjack's shoulder. She stared at the RED REINDEER, then at the sleigh pulled by--no. She wasn't even going to try to figure that out. "Uh, if someone needs rescuing from the Order, I guess I'm in" she said to Blackjack.

"...Let me just wash up first." She headed for the bathroom.

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The Necronaut wandered up behind the others, carrying what looked like a large red cigar and smelled like a scarcely contained pile of gun powder. "The way I see it, if a bunch of little fire-crackers scare evil spirits away, one big one ought to do the job at least as well."

Then he caught sight of the reindeer and company. "I see the Order's genetic engineering facilities need to improve their security. Happy New Year?"

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Before Bodhie had a chance to folow up on the "Mistletoe" Issue the door burst open and revealed an even more incredible story. Someone holds Santa Claus hostage? The Order? What the...?

Her immediate response was to grow a few inches in anticipation of yet another mission. It seemed they would never really have time to settle down and sort out their lives. The Order was omnipresent and thus their help was always needed... somewhere. Even Santa. Bodhie wouldn't be surprised if they would set out next to rescue the Easter Bunny and get Alice out of Wonderland.

"Ok, lets do this, but we should really consider getting us some kind of Aircraft or some kind of Transportation that's not... ethereal, no offense Necro, but that thing creeps the hell outta me. I'd rather walk than setting a foot again in that plane. It crashed once and I'm sure that's exactly what'll happen again..."

It seemed silly but Bodhie probably was afraid of flying...

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As the team piled in, the six white kangaroo-people started hopping along, pulling the sleigh into the sky. The bells on the sleigh jingled - all the way.

An hour in, just as the bells jingling crossed from slightly annoying to super-annoying, the Red Reindeer pointed at the onrushing North Pole, its red swirls cast against a sea of white snow. The air was bitter, but not overwhelmingly so.

The sleigh landed, cresting to a stop behind a hill. The team ambled out, to behold the sight of Santa's workshop, just as they might have pictured it - though not doing quite what they imagined.

Elves, all working with electric shock collars around their necks, toiled to put official Order approved merchandise into freight helicopters. From the Spartan action figure with Dissident-Dismembering Action, to the frighteningly anatomically exaggerated Druid, to His Most High Lord Archon, Ruler of All The World with Rule-All-The-World Iron Kung-Fu Grip, and the official Lil' Knights Watchmen costume and playset - the North Pole had become a propaganda outlet, as evidenced by the new sign "Under Management of the Propaganda Farm."

For a moment, they the group took this in. Then the ground itself began to shake. The Red Reindeer cursed.

"What's up?" asked Blackjack, too boozed up to mind the cold.

"The snow - it's all been possessed by an aspect of Aqua. His coldest, bitterest side, in ever molecule of fresh snow..."

Slowly, in front of them, a towering sight was seen - a giant boulder of snow formed, then it was joined by another, then another, all one atop another. It grew eyes that burned, that caused water to ooze out its sockets, a crying giant two hundred feet tall.

"Frah'sti, the Great Snow Man."

The Red Reindeer snapped his fingers. "But - Hex! Give me your book! With my laser-nose and its portal magic we can turn the tide!"

"How's that work? Lasering a spellbook, I mean." Blackjack nodded, slightly drunk, at the giant growling snowman, whose roar shook the snow from the ground - and the shaken snow began to run together, forming dozens - if not hundreds of Lesser Frah'stis.

"Well, specific resonant frequencies will cut open a portal to shut the hell up, that's how." The Red Reindeer concentrated, and his beam fired a beam of pure Christmas energy.

The Book flipped open to a page that Larissa had never seen before, marked "only visible during OOC threads." It glowed with the heat, tore free from the book, and slammed into the ground. It expanded, and its illustration shifted rapidly, into a swirling mass of color.

"With this, we can call reinforcements from the unlikeliest places of all: every other game on RPG-Post. With them at our side - we can triumph over the minions of Frah'sti!" The Red Reindeer shook a fist at the roaring frost demon, the belts of his harness jingling. "In the words of a man far greater than I - the shit just got real!"

Originally Posted By: OOC

This fight is 100% narrated. Spoiler: you win.

Narrate how you win, and how you defeat the legions of Frah'sti and the towering, all-mighty frost demon. Try not to kill all of them in one go or the big guy in a single shot - work with your fellow players.

As for the portal, for the climatic fight with Frah'shi, I'm not kidding: every single character on RPG-Post can zip on through and kick ass if they feel like it. The Christmas gift to the boards, from me, is me lifting the restriction on the number of PCs, just this once. Go nuts, you diamonds.

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The first person to reach though found a hand grasp theirs and suddenly a gorgeous woman was pulled out, wearing the strangest twisting metal garment. Taking a look around, she sighed a moment, then unleashed a blast of mystical energy at the closest charging frost demon, existing the portal forming nearby.

"Hmm.. mystical rituals, demons, it's Christmas isn't it? I should have figured I'd get tapped.. fine, I'll help, but I've got things to see to in my own dimension when I'm done folks. I suggest you get a few others for other fronts, I think the battle is going to get worse before it gets better. Also, Merry Christmas!"

With those words, she charged into battle, unleashing bolts of purple energy, and scattering snow everywhere as she did.

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An all-to-familiar flush erupted from the portal as an event horizon formed. Even as it settled to a glassy, water-like surface, it was already dissipating, but not before a figure emerged.

He took a quick look around, "This is not the fuckin' address. What kind of ass-tard shit is this?!"

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A wolf dashed through the portal next, bounding through the snow with breathless exuberance. Literally breathless, as it skidded to a stop at a vista distinctly non-Californian and at least somewhat non-Euclidean. Head quirked to the side in classically canine (ok, lupine; sue me) confusion, the wolf shifted up into a denim-clad redhead every bit as undead and confused.

Head still tilted, Sarah said after a long moment to nobody in particular, "I'm gonna kick some mage right in the dick."

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"It'll be in his front garden." someone else growled. A hirsute, shaggy, muscular and definitely naked man glowered at those assembled as he phased into view, stalking out of the varicolored portal with his head low and an edge to his voice that brought the word 'snarl' very firmly to mind. Eyes the lambent silver of the moon glowered from under thunderous brows. "Anyone wanna explain? Or do I get to greasing my chin with antler-boy here." The others could see Rudolph go pale under his fur, which was a neat trick for a reindeer-man, and go very, very still.

"Oh crap." he murmured, rallying in the face of some instinctive primal flight reflex. "Uh, the reason you're here is over there, sir. Ifit'snoproblemofcoursethatis." he nearly squeaked as he pointed at the giant snowman, the frosty legions and the elven slave-labor camp. The menacing silver-eyed man swung his gaze that way. He watched reflectively for a long moment, then looked back at them.

"This has gotta be some bad drugs that the last pusher I ate had in his system, right?" he asked with a crooked smile that lightened his expression from 'downright terrifying' to 'scary in an interesting way'. "I mean, I'm seeing a giant snowman and Santa's toy factory, but that's like a busload of old ladies and a coffee house." He sniffed the air experimentally, then made a double-take at the towering Frah'sti. "Fuck me. It's a good hallucination."

A roaring frostling flung a jagged spear of ice at Arcana and missed. Unfortunately, depending on your point of view, the spear of ice lodged into the burly man's naked shoulder, making him stagger and go to one knee under the impact. He roared in pain, grabbing the icy missile and tearing it free of his flesh. The open wound steamed in the frigid air, but even as his blood colored the snow they could see the gash start to close.

"Motherfucker!" the snarl was back in his voice as he turned and squared up to the ongoing conflict. "Old lady or not, you just got yourself a fight, granny." Fur sprouted down and across the man's spine and back, spreading like wildfire over his skin as he grew and shifted, bones popping like tiny fireworks as they reshaped in a way that must have been painful, but the bloodthirsty howl that came from the lupine throat was exultant. Where the large man had been standing was a huge wolf such as might spring from the nightmares of old ladies with red-cloaked granddaughters everywhere, snarling as it tamped down it's hind legs and sprang into the melee.

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As if opening "doors" and casting spells wasn't enough "bending" for Bodhie now people started to pour out of said portal to join their fight. For a second she thought hey, aren't we supposed to be the heroes around here? Who's stealing our show!?, but then she saw him.

Her mind went completely AWOL and a huge smile was suddenly plastered on her face. Forgotten was the immediate threat, forgotten her "issues" about portals and magic and other people stealing their "show". All that mattered now was watching him in all his naked glory. Obviously Hex had cast some kind of time manipulation spell, since everything he did was slowed down to the extreme. "Good thinking, Hex.", Bodhie managed to comment still a huge grin on her face. Then she sighed.

He was pissed, royally pissed and soooooo damn handsome! Bodhie sighed again feeling all tingly and warm inside. Even when he got hit by that icespear he looked good. He just shrugged it off and growled at the 200-Foot Snowman, as if nothing could stop him. He was saying something but the words didn't reach her mind. Only his entrancing voice echoed through her being drawing out another sigh out of her.

And then he changed into a... dog?!?. "What the?...", Bodhie blinked several times still somewhat dazed by the emotional rollercoaster she's been through.

A huge fucking... dog? No... it's a wolf... a wolf? Why?, angrily she balled her fists until her knuckles came out all white. She started to fucking hate men.

"Screw you all! Screw you!", she yelled, charging blindly into the giant Snowman, fists swinging wildly, highly uneffective.

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He blazed through the gate in streak of blue and white, a marvel of muscle and sinew streaking through the bitterly cold air. What light there was glinted from teeth so perfect as to make a dentist sob, and his golden hair wasn't so much as mussed by his flight.

Unfortunately, the course of this paragon of super-humanity carried it directly into one of the larger snow creatures. He hit, and punched straight through, leaving a whole in the lesser frah'sti's center... a whole that the frozen golem looked down upon with coal-button eyes and let out a growl.

Well past the creature, The Crusader pulled up, surveying the frigid landscape with utter bewilderment. After a moment, he exclaimed in a baritone so rich that the female elf-slaves nearly swooned, "My God, the Windy City has become the Windiest Outpost! They've turned Chicago into the North Pole!"

Then he turned, and saw something that ran cold shivered up his mighty spine. A veritable army of the frah'sti was swarming toward him, his gap-chested friend in the lead.

In utter horror, he pointed and yelled, "Run! It's a Yule Tide!"

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Rianna stepped through the portal, immediately sizing up the situation and nodding. She didn't recognize most, and se did note the Crusader's presence. "Well, I did want a white Christmas."

Wasting no time the beautiful redhead grew in stature, even as her body became living metal. The nearest bunch of snow monsters turned to her, and with a wave of her hand each was compressed into a superdense ball of lifeless snow. "I'll save those for later, when he shows up."

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Craig didn't know where he was, other than it was colder than he'd ever been. The snow monsters were obviously Titanspawn and that's all he needed to know. He drew his Gun given by his Father and smiled.

"Looks like Ah made it to tha Partee on tahme." He fired off a number of shots into one of three near him and smiled as it went down." Another moved in, and his whip lashed out, literally decapitating the snowbeast in a single lash.

"No need to lose yer head friend, dere's plenty more fer everyone..."

The young scion of Thor felt truly at home, though he'd never been so cold before.

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The Scion of Susano-o laughed. Such a brawl was certainly a spectacle worthy of legend, and he dove in, just as he knew his father would have him do. The tripod fell away as the little Asian man revealed a gleaming blue-silver katana, using it to bisect first one snowbeast and then another. He felt the presence of another Child of the Gods and chuckled as he watched the cowboy go to work.

Not to be outdone, he used all the power of his father he possessed to lay low even more of the beasts. The Metal redhead made him wonder, but then she killed snow beasts and he smiled. Someone was planning for later, for a grand game.

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Ripped from his home, Kaien wasn't happy, but the firgid temeperatures and raging snowbeasts made him smile. It was just like the arctic pole on Xydar.

He reached out gathering up a horde of snowbeasts at once, and then he dispersed them, disincorporating them molecularly.

In a moment of pride he chuckled. "Too easy." Seeing another fight with a sword, his own blades of telekinetic force came into being. "Let the games begin then. Then he joined the fray upon the ground, lending his swords to the others, laughing all the while.

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Mel Grimson, ex-merc and Argonaut, looked about the scene he'd found himself in, and scowled. "Wesson and the other brainheads better explain this to me when I get back." Then, he realized that he was not far from the odd looking blond nova, and he too was in the animated snowman rampage path.

"Hey, buddy!" He called to the Crusader, "Less yapping, and take them down before they get you!" Grimson followed up this verbal call by daringly charging at the advancing horde of ice and snow. A Glock in hand, he used his other fist to swat apart the first frash'sti encountered, and then a barrage of bullets pin-point blew up the next few icy beasts getting too close.

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One would think someone who controlled snow to be useless in an area like this. Melissa was anything but. Ice would form around the heads of snowmen, and in an instant the heads would fall off. She moved on a rail of ice, all foes around her suddenly decapitated. The young actress learned a new trick, and used it to stunning effect.

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Ryoma didn't know why he was here, but he did know there were foes to fight. Raising his swords he joined his brothers in arms cutting down snowbeast after snowbeast. Knowing he was a few down as they called out each kill he smiled. He came to a field of fresh unkilled snowmen and nodded.

He stabbed downward with Blood-drinker and chanted "The Earth thirsts for the forbidden drink, slake her, my blood- Drenched Carpet!"

All across the field vine-like extensions of his sword sprung forth, impaling and killing all the snowmen there. As he withdrew his sword he smiled and called out his own number. "Sixty-five!"

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It struck Lan as odd that no one had yet used fire, but then he hadn't either, mostly to avoid drawing attention to himself.

as More came to bear down on him, he sighed.

"No helping it now."

He inhaled deeply and breathed, blue flame emerging from his mouth and melting half a dozen snowmen. More rose to take his place and the Young Firebender chuckled, though magic, fire still had the traditional effect.

His fire never extinguished, and many snowmen died before the holy blue flame of the Fire Nation.

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TK watched the stunning displays of the others and endeavored to not be left behind. She wiped way the snowmen around her with telekinetic might, and those she couldn't reach that way exploded under the onslaught of her mental attack, as the bare consciousness animating them was simply sundered by her mental might.

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Zack wasn't haf as strong as the others, but he could still fight. With that resolve he hefted the Shotgun and fired. It took three rounds but the snowman went down, missing most of it's upper half. "00 buckshot for the win, eh? I can live with that."

Using what little power he had, he awakened the shells in the chamber, so that the struck with all the power within.

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High above the battle the resonance of the page brought to existence seven arcane wards that shimmered with a dark power and a mystical radiance. At their center swirled a dark mass of energy, an entity filled with such hate and disgust for all things that it was sealed away long ago in a parallel world.

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend." Was the magic's logic, and so, one by one the arcane glyphs that kept the monster in check were shattered in a blast of purplish/black energy. As each shattered the energy within he center grew larger and larger until it seemed as if nothing could hold it any longer. The seventh glyph shattered and in an explosion of power the smokey energy cast from it a dark meteor; A black 'bullet' that screamed towards the earth leaving an inky black trail behind it.

"The first angel sounded his trumpet, and there came hail and fire mixed with blood, and it was hurled down upon the earth. Revelation 8:7." Blackjack looked up from his alcoholic haze, and quoted scripture. "That's one hell of a nose you got there..."

The meteor spiraled towards the frost demon and it's minions until suddenly shifting it's course coming to a near halt as the meteor itself was revealed to be an angelic form, it's black wings wrapped tight around it's body. As they spread, his wing caught an updraft and he stopped almost immediately. Shrouded in black leather pants and long black leather duster his wings beat heavily in the air. The Red Reindeer had summoned the one being within a billion parallel dimensions that hated Christmas more than anything.

Revenant, The Angel of Death.

Guns glistened into being, seemingly from nowhere, and with lightning speed and accuracy their muzzles flashed with otherworldly fire. Bullets shrouded in the essence of pain, misery and death rained down upon the battlefield, shredding minions and infuriating Frah'sti with every puncture to the demon's snow covered hide.

There he hovered, his yellow eyes gleaming with and burning with wrath so hot that it left yellowish wisps in the cold air that smoked up from the burning sockets. His teeth were clenched and the grimace upon his face spread panic in the weakest of the demons minions...

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In the wake of the Dark Angel's Holiday Wrath, a bright yellow school bus slewed through the shimmering, prismatic curtain of light and fishtailed to a stop in the snow. Teenaged voices rose in protests and blame and an exceedingly voluptuous girl stumbled out of the vehicle as the folding door hissed open.

"It wasn't my fault!" Delilah claimed, her green, spike-heeled boots sinking deep into the pristine snow as she glared inside the bus, hands propped in her velvet clad hips. The young succubus was dressed - barely - in a vivid green, white fur trimmed Santa's Elf outfit, including white and green stripped stockings, a broad, black, buckled belt cinching her wasp-waist, and a bell-tipped hat resting on her scarlet tresses. Her purple eyes were lambent with ire, yet the sharp horns on her head and the great, sable wings spreading from her back somehow didn't detract from her wanton cuteness. A palpable heat emanated from the Hellish, golden runes painting her delectable flesh, and presumably kept her from freezing her luscious ass off. "It was only my second time driving and I didn't see that Stop Sign 'cuz of the snow."

"You didn't see the Stop Sign, Delilah, because you were looking at Kyohei and not the road. Ms. Nekomone, how could you let Delilah drive? You've been lapping at the egg-nog way too much. Where are we?"

"We're..." Delilah trailed off, looking at the sight of a Christmas Wonderland of Raging Battle.

There were Demonic Snowmen from Hell, well, they'd be from Hell if it ever snowed there, a mean looking - but cute in a scary way - yum, leather... - angel was flying over head, shooting everything, with guns, wolves were running around snapping at everything, a horde of people chopping and crushing and shooting and who knows what else at the other horde of Baby Frah'stis, The Great Frah'sti himself, who her mother wasn't very nice and not even good in bed, a CG Dustin Hoffman playing Rein(deer) Man, and cute, sad looking elves with mean, blue collars around their necks and mean, blue helicopters flying away with all the presents.

"... I think it's Santa's Workshop at the North Pole... and he's been bought out by they who even Lucifer himself can't resist... Sprawl-Mart. And their Snowmen legion is oooh!" Delilah interrupted herself when her eyes fell on the awesomely gorgeous man flying overhead, a cape streaming from his broad shoulders, who was all muscly and blond and good-looking and cute and strong and muscly.

With an excited flap of her wings, Delilah flew to the gorgeous man with the big blue eyes, a whip of flame appearing in her hands, with which she lashed out at Frah'sti's multi-bulboused (?) body, ice and snow sizzling into steam. When the Great Frah'sti went to swat this curvaceous gnat, the golden runes etched into her flesh flared even brighter, his huge fist beginning to stream with melt-water.

"Hi! Had I known Santa had you up here, I woulda tried to be Nice instead of Naughty."

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Out of the portal sprang three 'beings' about as different from each other as possible. In one direction walked a human in a black and gold gi. In another direction strode a 7 1/2 foot dragon-human hybrid with brown scales. In yet another direction trundled a squat green, silver and white R2 droid.

Zhu, the human in the black and gold gi looked around. Sensing the inherent evilness of Frah'sti and his minions sprang into action. As his eyes glowed blue, he preformed several different katas, each with their own reaction. The first cleared the immediate area with a gout of flame. The next caused the minions a little further out that hadn't been melted to drop into puddles of water and then freeze as solid ice patches to keep them from reforming. Lastly, the ground under Frah'sti himself started to buckle, crack and begin to split. The great chasm under the giant snowman wasn't complete, but it was definitely forming.

Draygo, the human/dragon hybrid also looked around. The sight was something to behold, and he wasn't about to let it go without getting his piece. So with a thrust from his legs and a beat from his wings he took to the air. Doing his best to keep out of everybody's way, he rained lightning down from the sky onto the small snowmen while making his way for the giant Frah'sti. He dipped and swooped and used his talons, wings and teeth to slash and gash the giant orbs of snow.

R2-FX's analysis of the situation was quick. He wasn't a fighter, especially in a melee this large. However, down at Santa's workshop there was something that he could do. So he turned on his repulsorlift and made his way as quickly as he could through the battlefield. Once within range, he started trying to slice into Santa's system and the shock collars on the elves. If he could help them, they might be able to help themselves.

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The Necronaut dove out of the Sleigh, pulled out his spectral tommy-gun and began sending spectral bullets flying out over the snow-field. A formation of lesser snow-minions disintegrated under the initial barrage.

"Marley!" He cried out wildly as he summoned one of his attending ghostly minions into the physical world. "It's time you redeemed yourself."

He drew his hand-crafted evil-repelling explosive from within his lab coat, lit it with the unearthly muzzle-fire of his tommy-gun and tossed the festively volatile package to the murky phantom hovering before him.

"If Frah'sti can laugh and play the same as you and me, he can die the same as you and me. Take him down."

The ghost was off like a shot. It passed ethereally through the snow-horror's face, leaving the explosive embedded there like a tiny novelty cigar.

The explosion rocked the battlefield and created a grisly avalanche from the slurried remains of Frah'sti's head. The faceless abomination did not fall. The still smoking stump of its neck turned accusingly in his direction.

The Necronaut grimaced. "Well, maybe not exactly the same as you and me."

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