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Joseph

What if?

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If EON had a dating service, what would you expect the members' ads to look like? I've decided to find. Here's what I think Chill, Mal, and Breearg's would say.

Chill

Under appreciated web master seeks adoring web mistress for continuous file uploads and forum script troubleshooting. Must be skilled with words and whips, as site staffers and regulars can get out of hand. Preferences to lakes of beer and British humor a plus!

Senior Mal

Megalomaniacal fire-wielder seeks devoted worshippers. Smart-asses and hecklers need not apply. Must be submissive and fawning. Lawyers and women, especially women lawyers, highly desired. No giant lizards, please.

Breearg

Ambitious young ebook author seeks like-minded editor. Enjoys the captive indoors of a cage in a basement. Open to sudden content changes and odd requests a plus. Love of all things New Zealandish a must.

Any other takers? Join the fun! :P

-Joseph

I'm gonna get it for this. ::Runs and hides.::

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Joseph

Wanted: A vibrant, energetic and creative women.  Mothering instinct preferred with a willingness to relieve struggling artists with their deadlines by doing their work for them. Good at art is a bonus but not essential (I blag it all the time). Must accept my opinion on certain Philanthropic groups as gospel.

Aeon

Young, virile, over-hormoned Scot wishes to meet girl (or New Zealand writer) who also likes to wear tartan dresses. Can provide own gimp mask (slightly worn with cage rust) and ten foot pole. Has own home with (plenty of) running water.

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Hey Mal, thoughtyoucouldget away with that while I was away, eh?

Well, I'm BACK!

And Mal's one is far more accurate than mine.  Apart from the virile bit...

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Y'know, Mal has reminded me of something that is just *wrong*.  You may or may not have seen this already...

http://partners.nytimes.com/2002....nFn-uFl

BOOYA!!! Monkeys, baby!  Oh yeah!  Smackity smack smack! heh, I don't know what the hell I'm talking about--oh well, just go to that site and see what I mean.

-Breearg

Monkeys can be bandits too.... G...

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And Finally someone gets the joke  

I know you are.

But on to better things....

Minerva

Young up and comming Goddess seeks equal to rule the galaxy.  Must have flexible morals and be able to recite poetry at the drop of a hat.  Sr. Mal need not apply.

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LOL good one Minerva!!! Mal you need to start payin more attention man, you're getting beat down al over the forums, today Minerva, tomorrow Thingmaker...errr....wait, he already got his in! HAHAHA! Oh Min, how do you feel about overworked disenchanted artists??

Jake

current ruler of universe seeks exceptional mate with wich to fend of wicked followers of youthful female upstart, must have flexible hours and a sizeable stromtrooper contingent, also Sr. Mal need not apply

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:)

Why should I feel sorry for him?  He thinks he is sooo superior... and yet when it comes right down to it... well...

We know where his bread is buttered...

---Minerva

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