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About Avenger

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  1. Holy Shit! I don't change my profile often. I actually haven't since I first started posting here. But today, for the first time, I dipped into my profile to add another .sig to my file, and lo and behold, I have upwards of five private messages sent to me by people on this board. None of which I ever received, of course, because I never knew how to check for private messages, as I am a shmuck. So now I've got a slew of private messages that I never replied to and probably pissed a bunch of people off. I'm sorry. It wasn't my intent to spurn anyone here, and I'll try to get back to all of you in due course shortly. Unfortunately, my computer is still FUBAR, so again, I'm using my roommates. Repairs on my system have begun, and with a little luck, I should be back in fighting shape shortly. That said, perhaps it's for the best that Avenger went on hiatus when he did, as it will (somewhat) explain why nobody has heard from him in-character in so long. I hope everyone around here is still doing well. Life has been...Hell, of late, and I haven't had a great deal of time for online endeavors. I'm trying -- trying -- to get into school, but that means working too, and school plus job minus car equals no relationship, so I'm working on getting a car, unfortunately my roommate was gone for a month so I got stuck will all the bills, and... Well, you get the idea. I won't regale you all with my problems, as I'm sure you have many of your own. I look forward to coming back. -- Avenger
  2. Jager -- My dear friend. It's been a little while, hasn't it. I see that you're still as genteel as ever, though I'm hurt to see that I didn't make it into your list of Terat examples. Forgotten me so soon? Or just trying to? I took a little hiatus that isn't quite over yet, but I thought I'd take a quick trip back to land to check in on things back in Cybertopia. Things have been noticeably quiet since my self-induced exile. Connected, perhaps? I suppose we shall see when yet I return. Suffice it to say that I've been making good use of my time away. In the meantime, however, I'll have a little free time to spare between studies. I should think (or hope, rather) that all you folks nesting in the urban squalor might still have a few questions for who's now being recognized by Interpol and Guiness Book of World Records as "Most Successful Serial Killer of All Time". Being a fan of the press and student of Journalism (a seeming lifetime ago), I'll gladly grant an interview to Zach Bronstein, crass little Howler Monkey that he is, if he so desires. I am sure that he'll find my decisiveness more to his liking. Good luck changing the world, Jager. When this is all over, I'll be glad to offer you any assisstance you require. -- Avenger
  3. Which was the same gripe I had when I started the first incarnation of this post. What I had intended to be a legitimate fact-finding endeavor ended up being swamped with replies that made my character feel like he was the only one who didn't know. Things got progressively better, but it seems that now the bell curve is drooping down to the other end. Avenger and I the same? Yeah, like Golden Age Batman and Miller's Batman. Give me the powers of a god, put me through a fucked-up relationship, have my girlfriend get murdered and have me join a supremacist movement that requires my killing people on a daily basis and Avenger and I would be almost the same guy. But of course, details like that are only superficial, right? Avenger and I aren't the same, though as my ST way back in the day required characters based off ourselves, this is what we got. I feel the hardest place to play a character type that deviates from yourself is online. One might think it's the easiest, but consider for a moment; in a LARP, putting up the facade of being a six hundred-year old bloodsucking Frenchman requires period garb and a bad accent. In tabletop, playing a bombs disposal expert requires four dots in Dex and three in Demolitions. Online, playing anyone with an ability or tempramant deviant from your own becomes increasingly difficult. You can't fake knowing all there is to know about Renaissance Art when character interaction through text is all you have. So when I come here, I like to play characters that I have the mettle to back up. I'm not going to pretend to be an overweight black lesbian trapped in a loveless marriage raising three kids. I'd frankly be able to do fake it easier in reality. That said, I don't think it's at all off-kilter when people show up here playing representations or avatars of themselves. The only time it gets out of hand is when the person is a fucking lout, but I don't see any of them here, thankfully. I like using canon. But if I may sound a bit rules Gestapo, I think the board would benefit from a little regulation. From now on, I suppose you'll all be able to tell when I've posted, because every post I have is going to look like the following: Date: 04222009 Place: New York City Continuum: Avenger's (or whoever) or ,,Date: 096112012 Place: South Seas Continuum: Jager's This is simple, so pay attention: 1. Was your character active during the date of the post? If Yes, proceed. If No, do not post without a character who was active during that time. 2. Would your character have reason or motivation to be present at the locale? If Yes, proceed. If No, do not post without a character who has a reason to exist in this space. 3. Does your characters' background story jibe with that of the continuum you're posting in? If Yes, POST! If No, get a character who does. Is this a bit much? Not really. Characters are versatile, and if you need to say something, you'll find some way -- someone -- to say it. For a post in 2015, I'd paint Avenger up as a taint-buttered madman -- or a redeemed pacifist saint. Where he goes is of concern only in that thread. If I needed someone to make a rational argument for killing your enemy in a post at that time, I'd just use another character. No big deal. Anyway, just a thought. I'll use this for now on so that nobody gets confused or feel out of temporal space, and you have the choice to contribute along those guidelines or not. I don't really mind. It's more for people who would follow-up post. -- Avenger
  4. Ewwww....Apep has sex with Leviathan? Anyway, I'm beginning to see what you mean. Things have become a little odd of late, to say the least. I had hoped that the latest development in the little story I've been crafting would have provoked some interesting reactions, but instead received more of the same. I suppose I really shouldn't have expected otherwise, but when Jager introduced Costas, I had to drag the little fracas out to it's inevitable end, which meant running with it in the manner that I thought my character would. So call me optimistic if I thought I'd get something other than the "You suck!" argument again. Other than that, not a whole hell of a lot has been going on lately, has there? Anyway, who is Synapse? This is a new one on me. He (or she?) laid it on a bit thick, though they did their research. On the one, I'd like to walk away for awhile, too. On the other, I feel more inclined to find a reason to bring Avenger back. Neither will probably happen anytime soon. Well, you'll be missed. Until you feel like returning. -- Avenger
  5. Anyone who would attempt to exact retribution for what I did is welcome to try. I will fight back. I expected no less of any of my so-called victims and I would expect no less of you. No quarter asked or given. Have any of you considered intent? Do any of you understand what the word means? You'd think -- as fucking advanced as we creatures claim to be -- that you would see things a little less black and white. There is always a circumstance, always a time and place where the rules no longer apply. Where you have to pay the price and accept the fact that you have to do something that you know full well you're going to hate yourself for the rest of your life for, all in the name of what you hope will be the greater good. When you kill a man in battle, it is patriotic. Heroic, even. When we kill a man for sleeping with our spouse or stealing from our home, we are a murderer. The difference? Intent. I never wanted to kill Kera. That wasn't my intention. But I was prepared to finish that wretched debacle that evening, and I would have sacrificed anyone present to do it. Kera, James, Jager....myself. I'm in this for the whole, boys and girls. This isn't about me and it never was. The men I killed hurt many, many people. Sometimes scores. Many felt good about it. Those that were so tormented that they felt they could do nothing else were put down mercifully and quickly. And they were put down so they couldn't hurt anyone else. I will wrestle with what I did for the rest of my life. Anyone who thinks I pose a further danger to girls inhabited by sociopathic rapist-murderers is welcome to hunt me down and exact your righteous fury. But I've turned a corner in my life. I have more important things to do now than hang out here justifying my actions and explaining to would-be copycat avengers that bust down my door why they'd be better off running away. Hunt me down and I'll fucking bury you. From here on out, you all won't be hearing much from me, something I am sure most of you will consider a boon to your continued existence. I will occassionally make myself heard as is needed, but for the better part, I plan to be too busy killing people to get a whole lot of typing done. As a slight exemption, I will still leave the occassional message for Jager when I am unable to get ahold of him otherwise. He and I still have much to talk about. Lastly, a few final words for you, Violette; This is the second time that I promised to protect an innocent and failed. It was the second time that I failed in my primary directive, and that is to defend those who cannot defend themselves. The first time was when the only woman I ever loved was killed in her home by a psychopathic killer-for-hire because she got a glimpse at information that a tenth of which would get you greased. I don't live a guilt-free, regret-free life. I have more than I'll ever need. I doubt you or anyone else could claim otherwise. I am vilified because I splay out my mistakes and sins for all to see, so that every pinhead with a keyboard can comment on my situation, like I spread this information because I want the insipid criticism of small-minded ass-ticks. I exhibit my regret for reasons that are none of your fucking business. You choose to read and reply. If I felt inclined to root out your every secret sin, what would I find? Until you have been where I have been, seen the things that I have seen, you have no place to judge me. You are a babe in the fucking woods until you have walked a week in my steel-toes. What you do not know about me could just about fucking well fit on the surface of fucking Jupiter. Come get me or shut your fucking mouth. That's the end of it for now. Post your little arguments, your little complaints, your well-planned philosophical debates for what I horrible person I am. I'm not replying anymore. I don't care about your approval and I never did. What started as an explanation turned into trying to make someone else understand. That became something I never intended. And I'm tired of playing the game. So I'm ending it here. Unless you have something more to say than restating "You're a bad, bad man" one hundred different ways, I'd advise you to not waste your time. I am a warrior. You are not. Evil exists. Good -- or ambiguous, if you prefer -- must combat it. That is all. -- Avenger
  6. Fuck off, kiddo. Feeling bad about what I did and mourning the death of an innocent doesn't mean I've gone a rubbery one, and it sure as hell doesn't mean it's taken the edge off my tongue. Besides, you're hardly one to whine and bitch about masochism. I know full well how fucked-up you are. I wouldn't throw around the word "pathetic" with such casuality. I wrestle with demons of my own creation every day. The last thing I need is your meaningless derision. -- Avenger
  7. "I look inside myself and see my heart is black I see my red door and I have to have it black Maybe I'll fade away and not have to face the facts But it's hard facing up when your whole world is black" I'm sorry I came as a disappointment to you, Jager. I mean that. I am sorry. Not so much to you... I disappointed myself, too. I feel... I don't feel anymore, and I think that's the problem. Something inside me has died and won't be back. I figure I owe you some explanation. I think you've got my number well enough that you can already guess at what was going on that evening, but allow me to set you -- Elizabeth -- James -- and Kera -- to rest, insofar as I can. Which won't be much. When Costas took over Kera's body, he did so to hide. He was certain that nobody would attack and kill a twelve year-old girl just to get to him. He thought he would be safe. And he wasn't going to let her go. James' first device failed once already. I wasn't willing to chance another failure. That was our one chance, Jager. Costas wasn't the sort who is going to give you a second punch. You put him down when he shows himself or you don't ever. I was thinking about what was best for the world. If I hadn't -- killed -- Kera when Costas was weak, vulnerable and confident of his safety, I have sincere doubt we would ever get the chance again. I could not, in good conscience, allow Costas to survive that night. The havok he would have wrought in subsequent months and even eyars would have undone my work manifold and caused the kind of misery we associate with names like de Sade and Torquemada. No, it wasn't right for me to make the choice for Kera or for anyone else. But I did it any damn way. I have no choice but to live with that. I too was in Kera's head when I dealt the deathblow. The psychic backlash of four people screaming in unison will haunt me for the rest of my life. I used to enjoy that noise, and the hot electric hum in my frontal lobe of a life of pain being snuffed out. It was quite another thing to feel it happening to myself. And an innocent child. I'm not shedding any tears for Costas. I would kill him a million times over if given the opportunity. I have no qualms about having murdered him. But I shatter every mirror that I've looked into since that night. Something inside me wishes that it would cut my hand up when I do it, and the desire to feel my own hot, sticky blood wash down my clenched fists overcomes me. But I can't even have that catharsis. I am left alone with my self-inflicted emotional agony and have no release. I failed her, Jager. I failed her. I promised I'd protect her. And because I fucked up -- because I failed -- now she's dead. An innocent soul. A child. A little girl. I allowed her to die. She'll never laugh or smile again. She'll never get a chance to grow up or date or go to prom. And it's all my fault. This is the second time I've lived through this. At the risk of sounding self-pitying, tell me which is worse; to die in the conflagration, or to be the sole survivor? I would beg you for death, Jager. If I didn't still have work to do. If I didn't think I could at least try to redeem myself. I probably never will. But I can try. I don't feel very good about what it is I do anymore. I'm sorry I fled, Jager. I think I saw a little bit of something inside msyelf that I was never meant to. And when Kera's limp body fell into my arms, I found myself temporarily unable to recognize myself. For a moment, I lost my grip on what I am. Maybe it was the best thing that ever happened to me. -- Avenger
  8. Jager -- I'm disappointed. I'd have figured that you or at lest someone else would have brought the events of last weekend to the fore by now. Maybe you want to forget about what happened. I'm surprised, though. I'm sure you would have told someone who would be prone to expressing outrage on a forum such as this. Or are you all just plotting my messy death quietly behind my back? If that's the case, bad form. You should know enough to know that I'd know something was up if you didn't express your outrage. -- Avenger
  9. Ranger -- So much has already been said. Honestly -- and I've said this before -- there's nothing I can say to convince you that I'm right and you'll never say anything to convince me that you're right. That said, since intellectual discourse has failed, I'm going to be dismissive. You're a pussy, Ranger. Grow a spine. -- Avenger
  10. Look, Ashnod, I...I get what you mean, alright? I understand. Truthfully I'm a little ashamed it got dragged out as far as it did. What started as a reasoned debate as to whether or not killing was right has become... Look. I just can't deal with this right now. I wish you would have just brought this to me if you had a problem. For now, my advice is to just avoid what happens here. If you don't see it, it can't hurt you. Unless you had purpose in following this, it shouldn't matter what goes on here, right? I'm sorry I can't be my usual verbose self today. I'm just not feeling up to it. -- Avenger
  11. I wrote four paragraphs here, Ashnod. But in wake of recent events, just nevermind. -- Avenger
  12. "Still, if you have a suggestion then I am willing to listen." Yeah, the sarcasm fucking well drips from that statement. I don't recall Mr. Philanthropy extending me any such invitation. Face facts, Ranger. You had your mind made up about me before I opened my fucking mouth. What the hell did I do to you exactly? Did I kill your Uncle? Your Poppa? Your Brother? Some Monkey near and dear to your evolved little heart? Let it go. Your anger will get you nothing. It's a downhill path. -- Avenger
  13. Here's one, big guy; How can you claim to be such a badass when Synapse tells me that he happened to be monitoring the sector of the Blackburne you were staying in for awhile while you were tossing off to fake nudes of the Tommy Orgy trio? -- Avenger
  14. Jager, James, Gwyneth and Angel-Teen -- I've drawn a beat on our mutual enemy and have arranged for a confrontation. Anyone who is interested can meet me this Saturday at the Blackburne. I'll check in periodically to catch any of you as you arrive. Be careful. Especially you, girl. Ranger -- Ah. I see now. So that's the game you play. You decry me as a lunatic and a villain and yet you're open to the possibility of speaking on "neutral" ground with Costas. Have you not been reading? Can you read, you ignorant fuck? Costas is a fucking lunatic, and a hell of a lot more dangerous than I am. No matter how you slice it, no matter how deluded you are, the men I killed were not "innocent" by anybody's standards. And here you are, ready to make nice chit-chat with a dangerous, murderous madman who rapes and slaughters the innocent. It was only a matter of time before you showed your stripes, you son of a bitch. Congratulations, "hero", you just made my list. -- Avenger
  15. Angel-Teen -- Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. You have no idea what you're doing to me, girl. Honestly. I can't hope to explain further, so I'll just get to the point. If it's what you sincerely want, I'll protect you. I'll do whatever I can to keep you safe. But I do a lot of things that I don't think a child should see. I kill men every day. Do you want to see that? Is that what you want on your soul? If that's what you really want, I could never refuse a request for aid. However, I would advise you to take up Gwyneths offer. Staying with her will be better for you. I don't know if she can protect as well, but for your own mental health, staying with her might be better than the protection I could afford. If you want to be there when we take down Costas, though, you can come along. Another nova along to help can't hurt, and I'll not deny you a chance to dispel your own demons, if you think it will help. But until such a time as Gwyneth can bring you along for our final showdown, you're better off with her. I remember you, Angel, and I remember who you are. You were ten when I avenged you. The man who did those things to you was your uncle, as I recall. Your father must have fallen apart after his brother died at nova hands. No wonder he saw your eruption with such grim eyes. I'm sorry to hear that life has become even more difficult for you. Gwyneth -- If she'll have you, please, for the love of god, take care of her. Costas can't get to her. If you need anything that you think will help, just say so. Ranger -- Are you stoned, little man? Do you sincerely think your insanity proves a distraction for me in any way? My fingers move faster than bullets and my cognitive reflexes make "speed of thought" seem downright sluggish. I'll have this post finished in 2.8 seconds. Diversion? Yeah. Incidentally, I'll tell you what, Cooter. When you work your way down your list of "Important Shit" to do and finally get to me (after you've saved the world from the Gnomes of Zurich and led your ferret armada into the bowels of Planet Z, naturally), you tell me and I'll make a point to pencil you in so you won't have to waste all that precious 'masturbating-in-your-own-feces' time looking for me. -- Avenger
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